D

oh fuck, please

JUST SHUT THE HELL UP!

dont know if I could ever be
without you cos you complete me
and in time we know that we'll both see
that we're all we need

cos you're the apple to my pie
you're the straw to my berry
you're the smoke to my high
and you're the one i want to marry

cos you're the one for me, for me
and im the one for you, for you
we'll take the both of us, of us
and were the Perfect Two :)

And just when I thought that all hope was gone.

God gave me hope :)

I prayed last night and this morning for something new to happen. Something that would change everything. a sign that would tell me whether I should hold on or move on.

and there it was ..

During our Science groupings, Alshly handed me this letter from Mau(the girl who means the world to me) Actually I wasnt supposed to know that Alshly was going to put the letter in my pocket but I saw her so she just told me that the letter is from Mau and told me to not tell her that it was from her. ? XD

then I went to the washroom to read the letter.

She wrote Hold On. She told me to not give up on her. and She told me that she loves me :> thats what I've been longing to hear/read :)) and instantly I felt strengthened. I once thought about giving up but I dont really think I could do it but now that she gave me hope again, theres no way im letting go of my girl :)

"forever 21, okay?"

"mejo complicated lang ang mga bagay ngaun pero PROMISE hindi kita iiwan. love na love kita SOBRA. meron lang akong kailangang ausin at ayaw kita madamay"

such sweet words
words that I read every single night
before I go to sleep.

It gives me hope and strength
to face you the next day

I know you have problems
problems that you have to deal with on your own
I wish there was some way I could help, though

I love you, I hope you still know that.
I'll wait for you no matter what.
Just come back to me, please

Hanggang Ngayon


hanggang kelan mo kaya ko di papansinen?

alam mo kung ano yung masakit?
yung nilalayuan ka ng pinakaimportanteng tao sa buhay mo
nang hindi mo naman alam ang dahilan.

alam mo kung ano yung mas masakit?
yung sa araw araw na dumadaan
laging may gumugulo sa isipan mo.
kung ano ba talagang nangyayare?
hindi mo malaman kung anong gagawin mo.
hindi mo maintindihan kung bakit bigla na lang nagkaganun.

may nagawa ba kong mali?

ang saya saya natin ilang araw lang makalipas.
tapos dumating ung lintik na araw na yun.
tapos wala na, tuluyan ka ng lumayo.
nagbago ka na ..

ano ba dapat kong gawin?
alamin kung anong problema?
(na alam kong imposible)
o tanggapin na ayan ka na talaga.

ikaw na ba talaga yan?
naging isang istranghera nalang sa buhay ko.

siguro tuluyan mo na kong binura sa buhay mo.

siguro nga isa akong duwag.
sinukuan kita agad.
wala naman kasi akong magawa
kundi maghintay sa imposible.
umasa sa araw na hindi naman na talaga darating.

this is hopeless.
i dont know how much longer i could hold.

The situation's gaining momentum and this feeling's getting tense.
My emotions are building up, and everything's not making sense.
I'm losing my sanity. I feel like I'm losing everything I cared about.
This heart is nothing without you're presence, clearly.
This mind is drowning in doubt.

I wonder whats going on in your head right this very moment?
Why everthing turned upside down all of a sudden.
I thought it was only for a short period of time,
I'm missing you so much, if it gets too long, I could die.
This hurts badly, cant you tell?
Its like you dont care at all, its like you're under a spell.

Maybe its just me, maybe my mind's too shallow to understand.
But I'm losing all sense of hope,
My grip is slowly loosening, its slipping through your hands.
Its painful enough to witness you ignoring me
but what hurts the most is seeing you happy ... without me

Its like I'm no longer needed in your life.
but I hope there is some other reason why you're doing this
Its like no matter how hard I try,
Its always you that I miss.

Why cant you tell me? Am I not worthy of your trust?
Have I betrayed you before? Is this a command? Is this a must?
I don't know why you're letting her control your life.
You used to be that someone who wouldn't let anything interfere with what you want.

Where's the old you?
Where have you taken my best friend?
Is this person I see the new you?
Or is she still there somewhere underneath?

Oh God, I know that you know whats going on.
It doesn't matter if I know or not,
Just please help her, guide her in everything that she does.
So that she wouldn't do anything wrong, or anything that she would regret.
Please give her peace of mind to go through with life everyday.
Remind her that you're always there, dont let her be led astray.

And if there's nothing I could do to help her.
Help me stay away and keep all the pain inside.
Give me patience, so I could wait until everything's alright.
Lend me strength, so I could smile even though my heart is breaking
And please stay with me, until my heart stops aching

I love her, Lord.
I would confess this everyday.
Although I don't know how much longer I can hold.
I would count on the day where all the pain would go away ...

bakit ganun?