I dunno why I tend to get so emotional sometimes...
earlier we went to Northpoint, I was so quiet...
I cannot understand. I was feeling so unhappy. I wanna cry.
Days before that, I talked to my aunt Aileen who stays in the Philippines.
She asked me what I want for my birthday.
I said N95 (jokingly of course)... then she said, "how much is that? if it goes above 1500 pesos, I cannot buy."
So I said, anything then, how bout a t-shirt?.. I love t-shirts especially the ones with music written on it! hahaha... I'm a rockstar ya know? XD
Then I had a sort of flashback, one of my birthdays, I remember waking up to one of my aunts telling me "Happy Birthday! I Love You!" I even remember when my mom told me that. No feeling can compare to those five words full of love and meaning said by someone so dear to you...
And also the days when I wait for my grandpa's car to arrive and I can see them from my room's windows.. Then when they finally arrive, I go outside, and carry either one of my cousins, James or Simon... they're toddlers, so they're very cute and cuddly, also my other cousin Gio. whose 5 so he's pretty annoying now :) but still, he's my only irritating cousin, i remember the times we used to fight, we both cry over something, like the tv remote, the cellphone, James' or Simon's toy! hahaha... so yeah, I just miss them.. maybe thats whats wrong with me
Maybe I'm just homesick and even my own father doesn't understand...
He cannot understand me, i cannot understand him. So its total chaos.
ryt now I'm drowning in tears, cuz I just got scolded by my dad because of my behavior.
I don't know what I did wrong, but AGAIN, I'm the wrong one.
They just don't understand the days when I just feel so unaccepted, so alone, so sad and rejected. No one understands that, but me.
Maybe I'm insane, i mean, after all the things I've been through,
traumatic incidents,emotional tragedies, How could I possibly not be sad?? I miss my life, though its not satisfying, I miss it.
I am never satisfied with anything, thats the problem with me.
I dunno how to deal with stuff.
I wish there's someone there, willing to lend a helping hand.
Try to save me from the pit!
I wish I can fly you know, no matter how long it takes to fly, I wanna reach Heaven and say "Hi" to my dearest mum :)
:'(
enough of this. I'm out
-this ends here :'(
earlier we went to Northpoint, I was so quiet...
I cannot understand. I was feeling so unhappy. I wanna cry.
Days before that, I talked to my aunt Aileen who stays in the Philippines.
She asked me what I want for my birthday.
I said N95 (jokingly of course)... then she said, "how much is that? if it goes above 1500 pesos, I cannot buy."
So I said, anything then, how bout a t-shirt?.. I love t-shirts especially the ones with music written on it! hahaha... I'm a rockstar ya know? XD
Then I had a sort of flashback, one of my birthdays, I remember waking up to one of my aunts telling me "Happy Birthday! I Love You!" I even remember when my mom told me that. No feeling can compare to those five words full of love and meaning said by someone so dear to you...
And also the days when I wait for my grandpa's car to arrive and I can see them from my room's windows.. Then when they finally arrive, I go outside, and carry either one of my cousins, James or Simon... they're toddlers, so they're very cute and cuddly, also my other cousin Gio. whose 5 so he's pretty annoying now :) but still, he's my only irritating cousin, i remember the times we used to fight, we both cry over something, like the tv remote, the cellphone, James' or Simon's toy! hahaha... so yeah, I just miss them.. maybe thats whats wrong with me
Maybe I'm just homesick and even my own father doesn't understand...
He cannot understand me, i cannot understand him. So its total chaos.
ryt now I'm drowning in tears, cuz I just got scolded by my dad because of my behavior.
I don't know what I did wrong, but AGAIN, I'm the wrong one.
They just don't understand the days when I just feel so unaccepted, so alone, so sad and rejected. No one understands that, but me.
Maybe I'm insane, i mean, after all the things I've been through,
traumatic incidents,emotional tragedies, How could I possibly not be sad?? I miss my life, though its not satisfying, I miss it.
I am never satisfied with anything, thats the problem with me.
I dunno how to deal with stuff.
I wish there's someone there, willing to lend a helping hand.
Try to save me from the pit!
I wish I can fly you know, no matter how long it takes to fly, I wanna reach Heaven and say "Hi" to my dearest mum :)
:'(
enough of this. I'm out
-this ends here :'(
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